if butch is gender non conforming, would that mean femme is gender conforming? im not sure i understand the femme half of the butch/femme dynamic

soloontherocks:

discourseful:

not really, it’s kind of hard to explain but the way i understand it is that it’s reclaiming femininity as a lesbian? i’m not femme so i’m not really good at explaining it bxhbbdbdb

Femme is gender norm SUBVERTING, butch is gender norm REJECTING.

Butches reclaim their identity by rejecting the norms placed on womanhood by the patriarchy. If men say women must be soft, fragile, and gentle, butches are hard, strong, and assertive.

Femmes reclaim their identity by SUBVERTING the norms placed on womenhood by the patriarchy. If men say women must dress ‘girly’ and have long flowing hair and wear makeup and heels in order to be attractive to men, femmes say “I’ll be soft and beautiful and feminine, but it’s not for you, it’s for other women.”

That’s why butch and femme are lesbian only identities. Not only did lesbians make them, but they are inherently tied up with rejecting men and decentering men in our lives. They’re identities that both revolve around being women-aligned and only attracted to other women-aligned people at the specific and aggressive exclusion of men.

( @discourseful )